Family matters.

Three weeks since I last posted which is down to family matters that became all consuming of my time and attention. A close family friend died and then a few days later an even closer family member, both deaths were unexpected and came as a shock, and to make matters worse, my mother has entered a new phase of her life which is causing a great of family worry. At the age of eighty she's undergone major, but not life threatening surgery which has seriously affected her mobility. She's one of these old girls with a fiercely independent streak and declares " the only way I'll be got out of my own home is feet first in a box". The trouble is, the house she lives in is about as unsuitable as can be for a person with mobility problems and who has to use a zimmer frame to get around. Steps and tight corners and a large garden on a slope that was, and still is her pride and joy but that she can no longer maintain. Where she lives is quite isolated which is made all the worse by the fact that she's the last of the older relatives that once lived close by but have since all gone over to the great beyond, whilst all of the younger members have moved away. She is blessed with good neighbors and a few elderly friends all keeping an eye out and they will phone me when something is up, at which point it will take a minimum of four hours to get to where she lives by road.

Here's the really worrying bit; following the operation which involved a week in the hospital followed by two more weeks in an NHS recuperation facility, I collected her and spent a week (last week) looking after her needs and doing repairs etc around the house. I also spent time looking into her finances (as much as she would allow) one aspect of which was found to be deeply troubling. She's one of the old school that always looks for the best in people and finds it hard to accept that an 'official looking' item of mail might in actual fact have been sent by a crook. Her mail comprises almost entirely of scam letters promising £10,000, £20,000, £Half a million to the person that just has to reply to a mailshot and add their name to some scam lottery or other. Some purport to be sent out by legitimate sounding 'charities' and ask for a monthly contribution, and sorry to say, my old mum is gullible and easily drawn in by the bastards. I've a whole sack of this stuff I brought home and am working my way slowly through, whilst checking the many and various outfits out via the web. This week mothers brother is with her and he's finance savvy and going to gain access to her bank statements with her permission, to see exactly what has been going on and if necessary talk to the bank about defending her accounts.

Having an elderly relative, especially one so close become vulnerable health wise (both physical and psychological) and who is putting his or herself at risk the way my own mother is, could hardly be more troubling. My deepest sympathy to anyone with a similar problem to deal with. And here's a simple tip that may be of help if you fear a loved one of your own is falling prey to such scams. Type into a search engine the name of the so called 'charity' etc and see what comes up. It may be that they've covered themselves with a legitimate looking website and are able to quote registered charity numbers and the likes that may, or may not be genuine. Then type the name of the outfit into a search engine again but this time follow it with 'scam?' So ... 'XXX scam?'... and see what enlightening information comes up. You may be surprised and shocked at what you see, but it's good to be wised up.